Monday, September 28, 2009

Ode to some late night pie:

I wanted blueberry.
You said you had Boysenberry.
I ordered Boysenberry.
You gave me Blueberry.

The check said:
Boice & Berry Pie
A LA MODE

A boice, and a berry.
With a little dairy.

A mystery... Boice, about you, tell me more,
are you delish down to your core?
Could you be better than my blueberry,
Such a thing could not be, or else.... Never More.

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Ode to Mashed Cauliflower:

Mashed, Bashed, Smashed, Crashed,
Crushed, Smushed, Mushed,
Buttery, Garlicky,
Delish.
Omm,

I am BigRed destroyer of veggies.

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Ode to a mistakenly purchased jar of creamy peanut-butter:

Seriously...
No... look, just hear me out.
You...
Yes you, in your near identical window dressing.
Similar in every... single... way...
You... Are... an impostor!
I made a mistake, but only because you and crunchy look so very similar.
In fact, unless I am paying attention
in the peanut-butter section,
I
Might
Buy
You.
And in so doing,
I will ruin a weeks worth of PB & J sandwiches.
No amount of double deckering, potato chip, fresh fruit,
ENHANCEMENT!!!
Will save these sandwiches from you.
You are an iceberg to my Titanic, a spark to my Hindenburg,
I hope, we shan't meet again.
Life is too short, and you,
make
me...
Meh.