Ode to a mistakenly purchased jar of creamy peanut-butter:

Seriously...
No... look, just hear me out.
You...
Yes you, in your near identical window dressing.
Similar in every... single... way...
You... Are... an impostor!
I made a mistake, but only because you and crunchy look so very similar.
In fact, unless I am paying attention
in the peanut-butter section,
I
Might
Buy
You.
And in so doing,
I will ruin a weeks worth of PB & J sandwiches.
No amount of double deckering, potato chip, fresh fruit,
ENHANCEMENT!!!
Will save these sandwiches from you.
You are an iceberg to my Titanic, a spark to my Hindenburg,
I hope, we shan't meet again.
Life is too short, and you,
make
me...
Meh.